Report: Baseball Lost in Rose Bushes for "Foreseeable Future"

by Clay Beyersdorfer

BACKYARD - Sources tell End of the Bench that the baseball you were just playing catch with has rolled into your mother’s rose bushes and will be lost for “the foreseeable future.”

The ball in question reportedly took a dive into the recently planted Hybrid Teas, after landing awkwardly on the uneven terrain of your backyard before scooting into the thick thorn-covered flora. 

“It doesn’t look like it’s coming back anytime soon,” the source continued. “It’ll be interesting to see what moves they make to replace it, as it’s been the go-to ball for catch since last spring. Let’s just hope this isn’t the last we’ll see of baseball.”

While an initial search proved to be unfruitful, optimism is still “high” after it was reported that your dad, who has much longer arms, has now been brought on to assist in the recovery efforts.

“Don’t get too excited if I come over there and find it, or you’ll wet my plants!” he quipped said as he took a break from mowing the lawn to help you.

End of the Bench will have more as this story develops.